Culinary Failure

Nicole H.
3 min readSep 26, 2022

Thought a lot about the education system here in the country and I’ve been thinking about why they took away home economic classes in place of Advanced placement math and science etc etc. I think the school system should teach adulting 101 — at least learning to cook basic things to survive and financial literacy. Anyways rant aside…

Epic failure #1:

We were making snow skin mooncakes — batches and batches that turned out pretty good. So I thought of making Taiwanese Pineapple Cakes by hand. This past Saturday, I went to a wedding and the take home gift was a really good brand of taiwanese pineapple cake. I was so SAD when I forgot to grab my favor and left it on the table.

On Sunday, we tried to bake pineapple cake.It was the 2nd worst baking project Ive ever done in my life — the 1st epic fail I would say was that valentines day cake I did a while back. The recipe was a scam! 18 dough pieces, 2 sticks of butter… then the filling we made barley had enough pineapple filling to make 8 and didn’t taste ANYTHING like pineapple cake filling. The dough was way too oily and not crumbly so I felt like at that point I was just eating butter. Then we used the mooncake mold on the cake too but since it was too oily and runny, the design literally melted and became a flat ball and it looked like the cake was just cooked too much and cracked. With the remaining of the dough, we tried to fill it up with random stuff like plantains and ube, we mashed plantains but it was too runny and the ube too so he ended up throwing it into a giant bowl and made a cookie with random hints of ube and plantains. I ate the bowl for breakfast this morning with yogurt- but at this point I think I just ate half a stick of butter — thats my butter intake for the year !!

Epic Failure #2

So I was looking around my fridge for food and then remembered that I split a 10 lb bag of chicken wings from Costco because it was a really good deal. I think it runs for $33 regular price and we got 10 lbs for $21 and split the bag in half. Then I saw this recipie on instagram for cocoa cola chicken wings but apparently they dont taste like coca cola. So I wanted to try some with that — except I never have soda laying around…. cause I dont drink so much soda so I didn’t end up getting a chance to buy it. Well anyways since I still had 5 lbs worth and I hadn’t made a dent into the bag yet…. I was like okay… I should probably cook some of the chicken wings.

So it is advertised as cook from frozen which I was like okay Cool! because I didn’t plan out my meals like I usually do — I forgot lol. I took about 10 pieces out and filled up the bottom layer of the air fryer tray and was like hm thats a good amount — 4/5 pieces for lunch tomorrow and 4/5 for today + Spinach + English muffin and hummus. Good to go. Can I just express how DISAPPOINTED I was when I opened the air fryer to find that all the chicken pieces effectively shrunk in half and maybe less than half LOL and that I ate 5 pieces and I”m still Hungry LOL. It looks like 2 pieces should have been 1 wing LOLOL. And then at the bottom of the bag I just noticed a sign that says: Up to 8% solution of water and kosher salt ice. MORE LIKE 50%!!!!!! And I still didn’t get my coca cola chicken!! I just got buffalo sauce and dumped it on haha.

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