Corona

Even if I want to escape the news, I can’t. The media is bombarding us — not subtly but blasting it in our face. Its definitely a serious issue going around the world, but I dont know that sitting around and listening to the media is helping us.

I know I usually use this blog to share funny happy stories, but in light of the craziness in the world right now, I decided to use this blog as an outlet.

The last few weeks, I’ve had really weird dreams. I decided to take 2 courses this semester to finish out my masters degree, thinking I could walk in May 2020, but now it looks like I could have taken 1 course, finished by August 2020 and walked in May 2021. Resultant, its been a while since I’ve been feeling slightly stressed in trying to balance social, work and school responsibility, and I guess the stress got to me. I’ve had 2 point blank dreams where as dark as they are, I was in a pitch black room, and the only thing I could see was the first time around, a bright red snake. Granted the weekend before I went to Zava Zone and came back sore because my body is now telling me that I’m too old to be on a childhood playground, the snake bit me in my dreams and I woke up feeling sore ( until I realized it was because I went to Zava Zone ) The 2nd one was a cute looking porqupine type animal, again with me in a dark room, until its eyes turned evil and spiked me. This porqupine looked like it was built from pine cones similar to the pinecone trees in my backyard.

After the 2nd dream, I started thinking about why I was dreaming such graphic dreams that were negative. I realized that it was the fact of uncertainty, the fear of not being able to control things. As a very organized person, I almost always plan things from head to toe when planning things. Its funny because in almost all of my social groups, I’ve been deemed the “mother” of groups — always prepared with bandaids, random useless facts you name it. For grades, as long as you put in effort, eventually, you’ll get through it. But Corona? No one knows how this is going to end.

Eventually, my mind wafted to a verse that I always told myself in high school whenever I was victim to anxiety attacks: Matthew 6:27. Who of you by worrying can add a single day to his or her life?

And the answer is : We can’t add a single hour to our life by worrying. We can prevent things by using common sense, following the health officials regulations, wash our hands religiously. But beyond that, it is in God’s hands. So today, I’m choosing not to fear despite the messages that media leaves us with : Fear, Panic, and doomsday. I’m choosing to love others around me because we all need love. Fearing or anxiety tends to rub off, and I actually fear that that fear and anxiety will end up killing us faster than the actual virus because of our selfish nature.

I’m going to end with a story I heard the other night before the DC area started locking down. I had the privilege of attending a live recording of a podcast called the Moth in a theatre in DC. I dont know the gentleman’s name, but his message was powerful. He has a heart anyuresum. The initial surgery that was done for him did nothing for him. They wanted to do one more surgery on him, but there was a high risk of failure, death, or doing nothing again on him. With no surgery, and doing nothing, every day, there is a 4% chance that his heart would stop — effectively, 96% chance that he would live to see the next day, 4% chance he would not every day. Instead of being bitter of the card that he was dealt, his perception of life now is : Every day is a good day because I lived today.